serendipity
(n.) finding something good without looking for it
This is about how I ended up having a life in harmony in the Netherlands in my late twenties. For those who don’t know me, I’m an expat in The Hague who went through the difficult times of integration to a new culture and job market. In my early twenties, to be honest, I didn’t know what I would do after having a bachelor’s degree in Cultural Studies and a minor in Art Theory and Criticism. I really liked the study elements in literature, anthropology, sociology and art history. Yet ambitious, I had the vague idea of becoming a successful academic one day. Then my best choice was to continue studying. A master’s degree abroad was a good idea. I did research about the programs and universities in Europe and I chose Leiden University because it was ranked at the top for continental European universities in the field of humanities. I was crazy for Literature. Learning more about the philosophy and theory of the themes and structure of the subject satisfied me intellectually. Writing my thesis was the most challenging part of the study since academic writing rests on doubting the information you use and your critical approach needs to match the reader’s high understanding of the subject. Not speaking Dutch at the time of my study was a disadvantage for me because I could not get into the circle of the locals. Therefore I stack with my friends in the international bubble, which, as a matter of fact, popped after graduation. My entire network of close friends went back to their countries to work or to other countries to do another master’s or PhD. I also wanted to do a PhD in Sociology and tried to reach as many people in the academy as possible but my efforts were in vain. The amount of scholarship allocated to the fields of social sciences and humanities in the Netherlands was (and still is) insufficient to welcome more interested students. I applied to many programs with different research proposals but none worked. Then I was invited to Istanbul to be hired by Esfor Security Consulting. The Human Resources director had found my resume somewhere deep in the internet. I had totally forgotten about my profile at a Turkish recruitment website. Although it meant to leave my sweet Dutch boyfriend in the Netherlands, I took the challenge and went back to my hometown to work. At Esfor School, as they called it, I got used to making use of a lot of things in a short time. I learned that the best approaches to skill building were “practice makes perfect” and “failing better”. For example, I was a bit shy on the phone to communicate with strangers at the beginning but I had to get over my fear and it worked well in the end. I enjoyed being at the office and secretly looked forward for the random distraction moment by the boss to drop by my desk to teach me something new, which took about half an hour or more. In the meanwhile, the long distance convinced my boyfriend and me to commit more to our relationship and thus we decided to get married. It was a long planning and organization process (about eight months – since hundreds of thousands of people get married in Turkey every a year and all the nice wedding venues are booked a year in advance!). In the end, it was a dream-like wedding for us, who defended marriage to be an unimportant official contract between two people loving each other. But we had to show the Dutch and Turkish states the proof of our commitment to our love. Application process for my residence permit in the Netherlands was the unluckiest time for us because the IND, the Dutch Immigration and Naturalisation Service, lost our documents (!) and we had to wait two more extra months apart from each other. However, I must say that this taught me to be more patient with the government related issues. I don’t expect much anymore. Instead, I read books while waiting. (Achievement of 2016: 59 books read! Yuppie!) When we were finally reunited with my beloved one, there awaited me another obstacle: integration to a new culture and job market. Rather than only being an international student in the Netherlands, being a resident meant more commitment to de samenleving (society). I had to learn the Dutch language as quick as possible. I followed the crash courses of Direct Dutch Language Institute in The Hague. Later I took the NT2-II exam (Dutch as a second language) and succeeded. I still continue to go to the book club every two weeks to improve my Dutch. I also met the friends and family of my husband to have a better connection with the people here and their daily life. These really helped me to develop a relationship and become more local. They love it when I say Dutch proverbs. It feels like I'm one of them and I enjoy it a lot. After a few months of freelance editing at home (and countless futile job applications), my network back in Istanbul paid off: I was introduced to my current company through my former director at Esfor. The hiring process was another challenge. I was given a test case to prove that I could fulfill the needs of the company. And I did. As a Turkish resident in the Netherlands with a satisfactory job and life, I’m looking back at my first years of being a bachelor student at Sabanci University. Now I realize that I could have never guessed where I would end up.
I desired to do research in an academic field but it didn’t work out due to the financial conditions of universities, and now I do private research and I assume it’s financially more satisfying.
I wanted to continue living in Turkey close to my family, but I fell in love with a Dutchie, got married and moved to the Netherlands for the rest of my life.
I was almost failing essay-writing courses earlier, now I’m editing what others wrote.
Good things come when you least expect them.
As a conclusion, I am willing to take more responsibility in the coming years, such as project management and strategic planning. Building a strong network is a great advantage for our generation that has recently gained acceleration in climbing the career ladder. For me, career means endless learning and I love it!